the mark of those who cannot be saved

[stagemanagers]

[You remember dying. Maybe the memory is clear and bright and your body still aches from the cause. Maybe it was fast enough that you didn't feel it and don't remember what you went through. But no matter how you went out, that's no excuse for truancy! Which is to say: you are still in the school.

For those executed, you will wake up in your beds. The dormitories look exactly as they did when you first arrived, without any of the changes or personal effects you and your dormmates might have made. The only real difference is that the little cot in Ambassador isn't there.

For those who were victims, you will wake where your body was discovered. All of your injuries are gone, and you feel fine. It's almost like you're still alive - but you remember what happened to you. It couldn't have just been a dream, could it?

The school looks much as you remember it, save perhaps for a few key differences. For one, there's no groundhog murals anywhere. Where things were green on the other side, like banners or paint, you'll find that here they're blood red.

The doors, for the moment, are still locked. Looks like even death couldn't free you.]

Week 1 | Week 2 | Week 3 | Week 4 | Week 5

(( ooc: Welcome to deadland, everyone! It mostly resembles the school here, and new floors will be revealed after new people die. For example, the second area will unlock after the week 3 dead arrive, and so on. Also, all dead characters will wake up at their actual canonpoint, with all lost memories restored. Have fun being dead! ))

Comments

[alchemistake]

E...empress-

[Varian feels his breath catch when he hears the sound of Sissi's voice, sees her running towards him...honestly he's still on the floor, so hopefully she doesn't mind that too much, but he is at the very least alert to her presence, if...visibly upset.]

It's...is it really you...?

[wanderlusttitania]

[Yeah, she.

You're getting a tight hug, Varian. You look like you need it.]

[wanderlusttitania]

[OH HEY. Another perpetual walker!

Guess who's strolling up beside you.]

Good morning!...such as it is.

[samefacesyndrome]

[ Rina hears him and though she doesn't want it to, her heart immediately seizes up with fear. She remembers that feeling she had: The next time you'll see him he'll be dead.

What's she more afraid of though? That the feeling came true and he died after all?

Or of him. The boy that killed her.

She doesn't know what to do, how to handle this conflicting emotion. This desire of wanting him to be okay mixed with also wanting him to stay the hell away from her. So tearfully as he calls for her, growing ever closer, she grabs the shroud and pulls it back over her head, trying to hide like her first day in the school all over again, shaking like a leaf. ]

[voicerights]

[oh, it's you]

Empress. [A greeting, but not much more than that. For all that it's designed to assist with one's social life, it seems to be awkward when directly engaging in such]

[alchemistake]

[He'll hug her back, of course...and likely feel bad about getting her clothing damp from his tears. He honestly can't believe he still has it in him to cry, but...

Maybe it's proof that even in death, he can at least still feel. He's not sure if that's a blessing or a curse.]

I'm...I'm s-so sorry...

[Of course what he's apologizing for...is anyone's guess.]

[alchemistake]

[Varian runs- stumbles, staggers, he makes it somehow- until he gets to the garden...and honestly, he's scared of what he might find there. He had left as soon as he put Rina there and never once returned. He didn't want to go back. He figured he'd die with that being his last image of her...of her sleeping. Peaceful, with the wound he'd inflicted on her hidden from view.

But that's not how it's going to be. He can see the pink shroud underneath the tree far ahead of where he stumbled in, and his heart sinks. The flowers scattered around it make him briefly terrified that he's not going to find Rina as she was in life, but...

Once more, a corpse. Could that even happen? Even with everyone else being alive, could she still be-

He takes a couple steps forward, not paying as much attention as he probably ought to the water he's getting very dangerously close to. It isn't until he's close enough to see the shroud trembling that he gasps under his breath, nearly falling to his knees right then and there.

But he doesn't rush her. He doesn't come closer than he is now, with a good several feet between them.]

R...Rina...? Is...are you...

...there?

[yourattention]

Like a deus ex machina? Wait, no. A satan ex machina.

[You know, 'cause if a deus ex machina is a good thing happening out of nowhere then a satan ex machina is a bad thing happening out of nowhere.]

[samefacesyndrome]

[ The breath she was holding in escapes her then, turning into a frightened whimper. She doesn’t move but she speaks, slowly and quietly, knowing that she can’t hide forever. Not even in death. ]

I-I’m h-here…

[wanderlusttitania]

I hope you don't mind me walking with you?

[She's pretty brisk for an old lady.]

[tellthestory]

I know you didn't mean to. It's...

[But it's not alright. The Balladeer pats the back of Varian's head absently, staring blankly down the hallway behind him in shock. Rina? He accidentally killed Rina? The Balladeer's stomach churns. That's horrific - for her, for the both of them - for everyone.

He doesn't need any more details. He doesn't want them. His arms tighten around Varian. There's little to say to that, so he tries to think of something soft to sing.]

When you walk through the storm,
hold your head up high,
and don't be afraid of the dark.

At the end of the storm,
there's a golden sky,
and the sweet silver song of the lark...

[wanderlusttitania]

Shhh, it's ok.

[That he's apologizing...no, that doesn't matter right now. He's clearly in distress. Questions are not important right now.]

I'm here for you right now. There's no shame.

[She's also crying, now. Again. It happened again.]

[alchemistake]

[...she's here.

......but she's scared. Of him.

Part of him wants to leave. To turn around and leave and just...give her space. He doesn't want to be responsible for yet more suffering that Rina did literally nothing to deserve. His presence is nothing more than a hindrance at that point, and now that he's realizing that to be true...

It hurts. God, it hurts. But he doesn't feel like he's deserving of any sympathy here, either. He killed her, accidental or no, and that's not something he'll ever be able to take back.

Varian stays still and quiet for a long time, until eventually...he moves to sit at the trunk of the tree, his back to the side. He's still some distance away from Rina- not getting too close and certainly not trying to touch her- but instead close enough for her to hear him when he speaks. It just doesn't matter when he doesn't know what to say.

So instead, he'll sing. Soft, barely more than a whisper under his breath as he wraps his shaking arms around his knees.]

You don't have to be perfect
I'm going somewhere with everyone
If there is something I can do
I'm going to find it...

[tellthestory]

Basically. That guy never did like me. I guess I...sort of know why, now. I did break in here on purpose.

[For all the good that did.]

I'm...sorry I couldn't stop it.

[yourattention]

No, it's... What's that thing, from that show? [He frowns for a second.] Some points in time are fixed or whatever and can't be changed, you know? Same with plot points, I'd guess.

[Somewhere, Phas sneezes because I just quoted Doctor Who.]

[yourattention]

Well, not exactly that. It's more like... we're worm off the string now. We're wildcards. There's gotta be some way that we can, like, haunt them? Maybe?

[That's a normal part of this sort of thing, right? Ghost hauntings are, like, perfectly normal.]

[tellthestory]

I don't know that one. But I guess you're right. The show must go on, and all that.

[He thinks about telling Connor how his own show ended - how it might not be over just yet. But it doesn't always end that way. What if this one doesn't go like that?]

I learned how to...make my own story. Change the endings. I just didn't remember until now.

[yourattention]

... Can you still do that on this side? 'cause Mumble and I were talking and I thought maybe we could, uh. Fuck some shit up for the Wizard, ghost-style.

[And you all thought Rina was the one to worry about.]

[tellthestory]

Well, there's usually ghosts.

[He shifts idly, completely casual about this.]

In my show, I don’t think they did much until after I died. But that other one that happened... [wait] ...oh. Shit. I think that was the one Angus was in.

[yourattention]

Okay, wait. Wait, wait, wait. I still wanna fuck some shit up because I'm very bored but first: why would you bring people back for, uh. An encore? That's what it's called, right?

[He is, unfortunately, not actually a theatre kid. In either sense of the word.]

[alchemistake]

[Fortunately, Varian doesn't have it in him to relive all of that twice. He just...doesn't want him to get the wrong idea, that he went and hurt Rina on purpose. Sure, that doesn't make it any better, but...it maybe tempers the reality, if only a little.

The singing is soothing. It does a lot to help him calm down, even if he's still struggling to push down the panic threatening to well up and over and swallow him whole.

There's...a lot that the Balladeer missed in his very short absence. It's kindof shocking, when Varian stops long enough to think about it.]

I'm sorry.

[He's apologizing even if he doesn't have to, because the Balladeer died, and Varian went and made another body barely two days after. But he isn't just sorry for that...he's sorry for what happened to him, too.

It's...kindof been a bad week all around.]

[alchemistake]

[He appreciates Sissi's presence more than he can express. She was always so kind to him when she was alive...and he still remembers her execution all too vividly. They're both in the same boat now, of having accidentally killed someone...Sissi's was a genuine, complete mistake, whereas Varian's situation is...more than a bit complicated.

Maybe that's why he feels the need to apologize. He isn't sure he even deserves to be in the same place as her.]

E-everyone, they...they're still there...

They're still there.

[And at this point, he can't help but fear they will be until all of them are dead.]

[samefacesyndrome]

[ Hearing her own song back at her is a strange feeling. Hearing it from him though is even stranger. The conflicting emotions within her just get even more complicated, like a ball of yarn growing more tangled. She's scared, upset and angry... but she also still cares for him, still loves him not even necessarily in that fresh teenage puppy love kind of way but as a friend, as part of this weird trauma based family they've been forming. Hearing his voice, singing her song just reminds her of that feeling. Fills her with it.

And that just makes it more painful.

After a moment of silence (save for the occasional sniffle or hiccup), she sings back in a quiet voice: ]

I mean... No more hiding now...
Changing... So I'm trying now...

[ The shroud rustles and then Rina is pulling it off, sitting up once more. Considering the blank look she usually has and the fact that she was under a box last time she cried anywhere near this much, it might be a bit alarming to see how she looks now: eyes already getting red and puffy, cheeks still stained with tears, her lip quivering and her eyebrows just lightly furrowed. She's still shaking and one hand is balled up in the shroud tight while the other is still protectively touching her stomach.

She is uh... having a time. ]

[wanderlusttitania]

[Sissi closes her eyes. Of course they are. The Wizard wouldn't let them go. To what end, she has no clue.

But.]

And they don't know we are here.

...

[She doesn't break the hug off entirely, simply shifting herself so Varian can look at her.]

We must...do something. We must tell the living we are here.

Monsieur Balladeer said there might be a way. Varian...I know this is sudden for you, after what you must have gone through. But...we have to try. We can' let the Wizard keep hurting the people we care for!

[alchemistake]

[Oh no.

Varian looks over when he hears the soft shifting of the shroud, and...honestly? He was expecting to see her tears...but he had no idea it would hurt him this badly.

But truthfully, it's seeing her alive that's truly getting him. She's no longer pale in death, no longer bleeding from a wound he couldn't have hoped to repair. She looks exactly as she did in those moments before he'd pushed her, and his hands still feel heavy from doing it even now, and he just...]

R-rina, I-

[He hasn't called her "Rina-chan" in some time. Not even during the trial did he use it.

He didn't feel deserving.]

I'm so...so sorry.

[He stresses thinly, his throat tightening when he realizes she's keeping her hand over where that stake had stabbed through her. It prompts Varian to pull away, scooting back a few inches in the grass because as much as he wants to come near and hold her, to dry her tears and be there for her, he can't bear the thought of hurting her anymore.

Not again.]

I don't...don't know how I can ever make up for what I did to you. You didn't understand, you d-didn't deserve-

[His breath hitches, his hands drawing close to himself.]

I r-really messed up.