However...what I do know is this: Eurydice loves you. I could make my own guesses as to why and though I suspect it would do you better to hear it from her...at the end of the day, though the why might be nice to hear, it doesn't matter why. It only matters that she does. And it's your job now to accept that, and cherish it, and, soon, turn your focus to doing better. For her. Maybe not today, maybe not tomorrow, but soon enough.

Once you've had your time to grieve, that's when you say to yourself: "How can I be better for this person that loves me? This person that has seen the worst of me, has seen me at my lowest, at my most destructive, and I have hurt them dearly and yet still they stand beside me. It is not my place to determine whether that is right or wrong and I cannot change the past, but I can change myself now. Going forward, I will strive to do better, to look at my mistakes and be better so that I never hurt them again the way I have in the past."

Here, you are together. Here, you have the chance to be with her even after the mistake that you made, and you can choose to try and be better. For the person you love most.