curtainsdown | the mark of those who cannot be saved

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act 3

the mark of those who cannot be saved

[You remember dying. Maybe the memory is clear and bright and your body still aches from the cause. Maybe it was fast enough that you didn't feel it and don't remember what you went through. But no matter how you went out, that's no excuse for truancy! Which is to say: you are still in the school.

For those executed, you will wake up in your beds. The dormitories look exactly as they did when you first arrived, without any of the changes or personal effects you and your dormmates might have made. The only real difference is that the little cot in Ambassador isn't there.

For those who were victims, you will wake where your body was discovered. All of your injuries are gone, and you feel fine. It's almost like you're still alive - but you remember what happened to you. It couldn't have just been a dream, could it?

The school looks much as you remember it, save perhaps for a few key differences. For one, there's no groundhog murals anywhere. Where things were green on the other side, like banners or paint, you'll find that here they're blood red.

The doors, for the moment, are still locked. Looks like even death couldn't free you.]

Week 1 | Week 2 | Week 3 | Week 4 | Week 5

(( ooc: Welcome to deadland, everyone! It mostly resembles the school here, and new floors will be revealed after new people die. For example, the second area will unlock after the week 3 dead arrive, and so on. Also, all dead characters will wake up at their actual canonpoint, with all lost memories restored. Have fun being dead! ))

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[Salieri should be left alone. Varian should leave him here to stew on the gravity of what he'd done, because it's important that it sinks in since now...the rest of the living are just being put through more suffering because of it. But Salieri was right about one thing...

Varian is a child. And while he might not be able to forgive something like this, there's one thing he's resolved to never do.

He moves closer, wrapping his arms around Salieri's neck again, pulling him into his arms, this time.]

No one can be expected to make the right decisions under that kind of pressure. It's...not going to make up for it, at all, but...

[He closes his eyes, his face pressed halfway to his shoulder. Even here, he's exactly as Varian remembers him. The shape of him, the way he smells...]

I'm not going to leave you alone.

[he doesn't deserve this. He knows he doesn't.

Cause I think you're so good--

...that was wrong. It was all wrong. He's not good, he's a villain from someone else's story (Best Example of a Narrative Foil,) but Varian still wraps his arms around his neck and pulls him in, tells him that he's not alone and part of Salieri feels like he should draw back from that, but...

he can't help but fold down a little into that embrace, reaching out tentatively to put his arms around Varian--he doesn't hold on or cling, he just is there for a moment.

Eventually, he manages, quietly:]

Thank you.

[Maybe Salieri doesn't deserve sympathy, but...Varian went through his trial completely accepting the idea he was an irredeemable monster. Yet...each and every person there championed for him to be saved. Several of them were willing to put him out of his misery themselves to save him the cruelty of an execution...Salieri tried to go after the Wizard.

How can he not show the same compassion when he'd been afforded it when it wasn't truly earned, much less deserved?

He's tired. He's tired of the pain, and the suffering. He's so, so tired of being miserable. He doesn't take any joy in seeing Salieri, the one person among them he thought would never break...like this.

Salieri was maybe a bit too good at keeping his issues under wraps, in the end.]

...I love you, okay? No matter what happens, even if...even if we end up stuck in this place forever. I know you were trying to do what you felt was right.

[...]

But...if any of the others find themselves here too, I won't be able to defend you.

[He doesn't have that right.]

[at that last bit, Salieri lets out a small huff]

Please don't. [his voice is rough, strained, but he's at least managing a hint of that dry tone of his] They have more than earned the right to their grievances.

[he's quiet, for a moment. Then--]

I love you, too.

[Okay, good. They might never be able to air them, of course, but...it's a start.

There's not much Varian can do for Salieri right now, he knows. Offer him his sympathy, tell him how stupid he was, all of that is well and good...but it still leaves this awful, gnawing emptiness Varian isn't quite sure how to fill.

In the end, he shifts back and forth between what and what not to do for a bit until he moves to lay a kiss against the poor man's temple before drawing away from him just enough to start to stand, taking Salieri's hand because he doesn't trust him to actually reach for it or like...do anything without his assistance.]

This place is just like the school, so...we don't have to stay here.

[The dorms are...well. Back to the way they were, at least...he just doesn't want Salieri to stay where he was, you know.

Murdered.]

[Salieri breathes out as Varian presses a kiss to his temple, looking up as Varian then takes his hand and pushes to his feet. Considering Salieri's make up is something he usually puts on when he wakes up, he's not wearing any at the moment...and therefore the dark circles under his eyes and the obvious signs of exhaustion that he's been hiding in large part with makeup are now pretty obvious.

But he does nod, moving to push to his feet]

I see. How convenient, to not have to sleep on the cafeteria floor. [he's trying to affect some of his old humor; slot that back into place]

[A humorless huff of breath escapes Varian when Salieri says that, because yeah...it all is rather convenient, isn't it?]

We can't even escape prison in death. Should've seen it coming, honestly...

[And he really does mean that. It's a prison. It doesn't matter how many new areas they get, as long as they're trapped here...he'll never be able to see it as anything like a home. Even forming a sort of found family here isn't enough to change that.]

Sorry it's kindof...not the best kind of welcome you could've gotten, but. Honestly, things here aren't all that different than they were up there.

[...]

It's...quieter.

[No Wizard. No Hester. No murder. No death.]

Quieter.

[he huffs out a small sigh at that, reaching up to rub a hand over his eyes.]

Yes, I imagine so.

[Varian's brows knit together a little as they walk, because...it's made abundantly clear just how quiet it is. How empty the school is, now.

It's better that it's empty, but...still.]

Uh...before we go anywhere else, there's...actually something I want to show you. Is that okay?

[Salieri's attention snaps back to Varian then and he blinks once, before he nods]

Of course.

[Varian could have just brought Salieri back to Broadhurst, but...he has an idea. And thus, they'll be heading outside.

It's a bit of a walk for Varian to get to what he wants to show Salieri, but he'll likely be able to notice something is very off long before they actually make it to the edge of the field...

It's, well. The corn. And it is not at all like it was before. It's been decimated, most of the area run over and trampled into the ground. The scarecrow is once more ominously missing.

He'll just...let Salieri take that in before he'll explain why he's even showing him this.]

[Salieri trails after Varian, curious as to where they're going. At the sight of the cornfield he just...stares a moment.]

....ah. That is a change.

Yeah, it's...yeah.

[He's going somewhere with this, stay with him.]

Now, would you believe me if I told you Rina did this?

[that'll send his eyebrows right to his hairline--and he turns that expression on Varian just

?????]

[STAY WITH HIM HE SWEARS HE'S NOT PUNKING YOU]

...when I first woke up here, I went to look for her. Understandably, she didn't want me around her. She was...scared of me.

[He looks over the corn, trying not to focus his gaze too hard in the direction of where he'd run that night.]

But after a couple days...she came to me. She dragged me into the car, and...

[He gestures with a nod of his head.]

This happened. But I didn't bring you here just to show you property damage.

[Varian's shoulders relax a little as he looks over at Salieri out of the corner of his eye.]

I thought Rina would never want anything to do with me ever again. I would have understood if she didn't, even if I never meant to hurt her. But, she...she's too good. She gave me a taste of my own medicine, and after that...we talked, for a long time. We worked it out.

[...]

I guess what I'm trying to tell you is...if Rina could forgive me, then I think the others would forgive you, if we ever get out of here.

They're...good, too. Better than most of us...

[Salieri is quiet as he listens. He wouldn't think it of Rina, and yet...well, the evidence is there.

"--she's too good." Varian says, and Salieri can almost hear the echo of-- (unlike me)-- another sentiment that might follow. Because he things it, too, of himself. But Varian continues and Salieri listens; he takes in the rest of what he says.]

...I can only hope. [quietly. It's what he has now; only hope. Hope that maybe they could forgive him for this. That those who are better, those who are good, could perhaps... (Best at Being the Worst but still good, still better--)...perhaps. He can't let himself hope too much; he can't have that much expectation of Him, of Them. But perhaps, with time...]

Thank you.

...Don't thank me.

[Varian looks up at Salieri, giving his hand a little squeeze.]

Just...focus on forgiving yourself, first.

[The path of hate is a dangerous track
You take one step and it's hard to turn back...]

[Salieri's throat goes tight at that, and he squeezes Varian's hand in return. He huffs a little, an almost-laugh, though rueful]

...that seems like a tall order. [a bit dryly]

Maybe so. But if there's any one of us that can do it, I think that's you.

[Believe in him who believes in you, Salieri.]

What you did was stupid and reckless, but you did it with good intentions.

[...Salieri decides against making a comment about what the road to Hell is paved with.]

I'll...endeavor to do so.

[sorry, Varian, he may be lying right now. Fortunately for him, he's fairly accomplished at that...but he does offer him a small, strained smile]

You've certainly become very wise in the short time we've been apart.

Heh, well...I've had a little help.

[He nods towards the school, gesturing for Salieri to follow him back inside.]

You'd be surprised what motivates you. A little kick in the seat of your pants is a good enough reality check, sometimes.

[Salieri moves to follow, with a small chuckle]

I don't doubt that for a moment. And that was mine, then?

It was supposed to be.

...did it work?

[sldhfs Varian. Salieri is just going to pause, stopping them both before just...going to tug Varian in by the hand so he can give him a hug]

...it did. It might take a few days to sink in completely but...it was a rather effective verbal kick.

[Oh. The hug...this one is different. Much less emotionally charged and desperate (but still plenty of both), and one that Varian will return readily. Gently, but tightly.]

You should have known I wasn't going to let you die and then spend eternity feeling sorry for yourself.

[Which may sound harsh, but...]

I don't want to see you follow my bad example.

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